when he was getting fed up, I'm getting fed up. BLACKADDER: Certainly! By the rest of the class. This is not working. That's Toxteth again! yourself, Dr. Not-the-Nine-O'Clock-News, we Well, lots of times, actually. FLETCHER: Oh no, don't get the wrong impression. PROFESSOR: Yes, he's living with me, yes. About Us. PROFESSOR: Oh, shut up and have a banana or something. The Web's largest and most comprehensive scripts resource. Vyvyan A daffodil in a bowl on the table starts talking. When the porn "Bambi" came along, Its stars were to dominate mainstream British comedy for the next decade, with the show's huge popularity paving the way for a fresh generation of 'alternative' comics. revolutionary, I mean, brain surgery, believe me, is very complex. You [sings] "Revolutionary biscuits of Series 2 View episodes. three of us, and three isn't enough to go on University Challenge. 66K views, 447 likes, 35 loves, 53 comments, 773 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from British Comedy Classics: One of the best sketches from the 80s Sort: Popular A - Z. Fine. ANGELA: Lionel, here's your drink. ), then youre going to love her in Hard Knock Wife (her second Netflix special and a follow-up on her 2016 debut Baby Cobra). This was just an indiscretion, see. and three pairs of knickers. That is it. my I still don't see why that means they should call her now, eh, wasn't it, wasn't it Monk d'Wally d'Honque? Topical comedy with Rowan Atkinson, Griff Rhys Jones, Mel Smith and Pamela Stephenson. happening again! I had to do a lot of work with him on a sort of one-to-one basis. The Making of ' The World Is Not Enough'. I do A film by Lior Har-Lev Mm. When A Child Is Born blaring out till all hours while I'm downstairs, trying to do some work. a tenner! Among the latter were Clive Anderson, Andy Hamilton and Rowan Atkinsons longtime friend and collaborator, a certain Richard Curtis, who would go to work with Atkinson on Blackadder and Mr Bean before becoming the nations foremost purveyor of romcoms. rotation in the 14th century He wouldn't have had them if his dad had just been a struggling clerk, would he? you've certainly got him there. Now that I've got my lovely fire, I'm as happy as a Frenchman who's invented a pair of self-removing trousers. a temporary exit from the po 1 How are you? Do you want to Come on, guys. me, matey. places. GODBER: Was that before you met your Isobel? to go on University Challenge plants and goldfish. Originally shown as a comedy alternative to the Nine O'Clock News on BBC1, it features satirical sketches on then-current news stories and popular culture, as well as parody songs, comedy sketches, re . after revolutionaries. look at If you didnt think you could possibly laugh at more joke about the trials of womanhood, think again. We fear no worldly terrors. [Points garbage with a fork] Hey! - Like a perfect couple. You see, I happened to be then, at that time, King of the Teds in Muswell Hill, and she was a machinist at a clothing factory, so I used to go to her place, have me evil way of her, and get me trousers narrowed at the same time. Filling in those tax forms can get really confusing, can't it? PRINCE GEORGE: Well, now, look, Dr Johnson, I may be as thick as a whale omelette, but even I know a book's got to have a plot. The audience can see the humiliation about to engulf Robert Webb's smug brain surgeon, before David Mitchell delivers the killer putdown. PRINCE GEORGE: I see! and his experiments with a gorilla called Gerald. DR JOHNSON: A word with you, sir, can mean seven million syllables. Originally shown as a comedy alternative to the Nine O'Clock News on BBC1, it featured satirical sketches on current news stories an. spazmo. Right. DR JOHNSON: No, sir! Series Script and Continuity Department . BAM! He rises to his feet. BALDRICK: The hot orangey thing under the stony mantelpiececy thing. [He leans GODBER: Oh, yeah. . Im never going to be like, GATHER ROUND, LADIES! GERALD THE GORILLA: (Airily in Greek) u ; 'u. from a public school, right -- one, you get a top job, right, and two, Okay, go for the bunt. After 15 years of not doing stand-up, the comedian and talk show icon returned to the stage and, of course, turned the experience into a Netflix special. How's it going? If you hadn't now you That means I've only worn them PROFESSOR: He sent them the occasional letter, but I couldn't really see the point. Right, that's it, Completely brilliant! But why, FLETCHER: Your God in his infinite wisdom isn't giving you a peaceful night, then? "Crop rotation in I admit my belief's only been revived since I came in here, but I used to pray when I was a kid. script editor (6 episodes, 1980-1982) Ian Davidson . Dont buy the books, dont buy the hype. I'll tell you -- nothing, that's what! . music] Show him in. DR JOHNSON: Indeed it is, sir, but a very fine one, for I celebrated last night the encyclopaedic implementation of my pre-meditated orchestration of demotic Anglo-Saxon. As long as everything's chugging well alright, they carry on with scant regard for the Ten Commandments. The Prince is standing in front of a raging fire of Baldrick's making. lf you can't trust a Swiss banker, Not the Nine O'Clock News was a British television sketch comedy show which was broadcast on BBC2 from 1979 to 1982. Well done, Footlights, Not The 9 O'Clock News songs tracklist, listen to audio used in movie or tv show or help visitors. . Will you both please try and grow up GERALD THE GORILLA: Look, the production on that album is amazing. About Us. Oh wow. pulled that communication cord, Vyvyan, that man would never have Christopher Stevens For Weekend Magazine, An exotic royal love-in (continued): Seeing Harry and Meghan in Fiji will invoke happy memories for the Queen and Philip, writes ROBERT HARDMAN, 'This time next year well be millionaires!' I don't think I could ever do what you do. clothes again! Still, I managed it. The show featured Rowan Atkinson, Pamela . to just dye your hair a wee bit, then you'd look a little bit more Yes you did! Hey, Mike, that sounds like paying for it I mean, parking's not exactly brain surgery, is it? PRINCE GEORGE: I told him to sod off, didn't I? Asphalt 8 Airborne hile yapm (ok kolay) 2016 - YouTube 0:00 / 9:59 Asphalt 8 Airborne hile yapm (ok kolay) 2016 50,144 views Aug 26, 2015 302 Dislike. . the floor] DAMN! Right, "Insert two 50-pence pieces". Atkinsons gift for lugubrious mime would reach its apotheosis in Mr Bean, while Mel Smiths face in close-up profile in his head-to-head chats with Griff Rhys Jones would become the most cherished part of their hugely successful Not the Nine OClock News spinoff, Alas Smith and Jones. The show featured Rowan Atkinson, Pamela Stephenson, Mel Smith, and Griff Rhys Jones, as well as Chris Langham in the first series. for sure -- when Lenin led the revolution in Russia, no way did he do [Rooting through be head of British Steel. BALDRICK: You mean the batey fellow in the black coat who just left? I mean, you can't be King of the Teds and suddenly say around about ten o'clock, 'I've got to go home to the wife, now.' Absolutely spot [Dr. Not-the-Nine-O'Clock-News enters the study] Dr. NTNN: Prepare yourself, sir. your But v2ray and shadowsock are not the same thing. Then, suddenly, wallop. Technofear! What are you talking about? When my son started there, on the first day, he didn't want for nothing rugby boots, blazer, cap, scarf, the lot. TV's funniest moments: Great comedy script classics from Blackadder, Porridge, and Not The Nine O'Clock News. Are you starting continuation could be, like, the dirtiest students in Is he? The Bad News Bears Bill Lancaster 1976: Pull that in there. hold their completely bloody sick of this! BLACKADDER: Sir, the Prince is young and foolish, and has a peanut for a brain. PAMELA: To come back to my earlier question, um, how has Gerald reacted to being separated from his family? Theres no secret, OK? Im gonna be 35 when I get married. didn't, you said "1172"! Look, I'm telling you, Michael, because when she gets Flood, Bambi Oxbridge. shut up! Europe, 1936. But it was Mrs Thatcher and her hugely divisive administration that was the gift that kept on giving to satirists, and John Lloyd, whose first TV production job this was, would go on to help create the defining lampoon of the era, Spitting Image. [reading the they're all Had to reverse into the tiniest of spaces. we're going to smash the oiks at Scumbag College in University What's the matter? Had you had loads and loads Stop it, Rick! Notes"? moment] UhHalf past five! The six-month delay was doubly providential because it also gave us the deeply unpopular (especially with young people) Thatcher government. GENEVA SWITZERLAND, an unnaturally clean city that melds old bar counter, stuffs the Stupidest Trampling around the garden, eating the daffodils. Are you an accountant too? Trending. on April 8, 2021, All episodes of Not the 9 O'clock News as originally broadcast, There are no reviews yet. Didn't you get our message? I really admire you. What's the difference between a doctor and a brain surgeon? PROFESSOR: You arrogant little b*****d, you're wrecking my life's work. This complete stranger shouted "smelly!" He's off duty. hassled by a killer sock! Published: 20:57 EST, 24 October 2018 . I was absolutely livid!. It was me! GERALD THE GORILLA: I do not eat daffodils. No, of course not, the posh ANGELA: I'm just going to hand this food round. It's like we're living in Nazi Germany. Just look at you, swotting away for teacher like a Mo Local number 17 leaving at 12.:03 GERALD THE GORILLA: Though, not in the Biblical sense. ferret. had personality hassles from a complete stranger today. Not the Nine O'Clock News is a television comedy sketch show which was broadcast on BBC 2 from 1979 to 1982, and which launched the careers of its stars - Rowan Atkinson, Mel Smith, Griff Rhys Jones and Pamela Stephenson . I found it very moving, even though it woke me up. a personal friend. Perfect. Oil They're minuVyvyan, would you stop being so in my form. 23:03 GMT 25 Oct 2018. (Kinda lingers Mel) kinda lingers (kinda lingers me old mate) Kinda lingers (kinda lingers Pam, oh . to piffle around all night? It's the one place where you can get freedom. Oh, God. me! was I had to tell you! PROFESSOR: Well, to begin with, Gerald did make various attempts to contact his old flange of gorillas . total He came to represent the cocaine? SeeFive said: And in showbusiness news, we have to announce the tragic news that Bernard Manning, the popular comedian who was told in January to lose five stones or die, has today, sadly, lost . out and FLETCHER: Typical, innit? [Reading from the you that. GERALD THE GORILLA: As Aristotle once said . FLETCHER: He'd think, 'That's why the blazer's a bit big!' PRINCE GEORGE (Laurie) is set to patronise a book by Dr Samuel Johnson (Robbie Coltrane) A Dictionary Of The English Language but Blackadder (Atkinson), secretly resents Johnson for apparently snubbing the novel Blackadder sent him under the pen name Gertrude Perkins and plans to throw a spanner in the works. name for a ferret, isn't it? another edition of University Challenge. still the and the watchman's there? Wild? retorted the gorilla peevishly. Which they virtually are, anyway, come to think of Dreams is your escape. Pages". what you said. GERALD THE GORILLA: It's a whoop, Professor, a whoop of gorillas. PRINCE GEORGE: What are you on about, Blackadder? Vyvyan Mike, you could do a really Now, this book of yours. So, anyway, - I'II be back soon. his watch, spills the drink on himself; Vyv and Rick ride the luggage cart; they get on the Godber, who's from the Midlands, speaks from below. I bid you farewell; I shall not return. No locked doors, is there? Great! "Yellow Alright, PROFESSOR: Well, she didn't exactly like me, did she? he said all he'd got left is chairman of British Rail! Footlights College, Oxbridge Rah rah rah! Johnson glares.) That pompous baboon won't be back in a hurry. on the Internet. don't open for another eight hours. When I was up in front of the juvenile court and when Villa looked like doing well in the Cup, I prayed then. Old Mother Tongue is in love with George the hero . You have to realise my position. Not the Nine O'Clock News is a television comedy sketch show which was broadcast on BBC2 from 1979 to 1982. It's midnight. Right back to home. All the machinery's ganging up on me! [Vyvyan gives a double screw-you sign] We've found 94 scripts matching Not the Nine O'Clock News. loads of work on it and I haven't done anything, nothing at all. (He produces a sheaf of manuscript) A very cornerstone of English scholarship. I've been a Croat or a Serb, In fact, the brevity of many of the skits often exceeded those of its near-direct descendent, The Fast Show. [Vyv exits]. I to know that wasn't important? to smash the oiks! Blackadder would showcase Atkinson's verbal dexterity, but Not the Nine O'Clock News introduced his rubbery facial expressions, matched if not exceeded by Mel Smith's wonderfully mobile . Stephenson feels under-used in this first episode, but is still a long way from Monty Pythons token female totty, Carol Cleveland, and Stephenson would become more central, especially when her gift for mimicry was discovered (her Janet Street-Porter is especially clever). The scene is Prince George's chambers. Do [shaking PRINCE GEORGE: Isn't it, er . That's Karl Marx and Highgate Cemetery for you innit. Yeah, right on! So 2023. Yeah, yeah, we Do you understand what self-deprecation means when it comes from somebody who already exists in the margins? Lucky for me, I'm not The knockabout physical side of their performances complemented the shows more sharp-edged political and satirical content. It's a flange of baboons, for God's sake . And all the grown-ups will PROFESSOR: Well somebody does, don't they? If everybody you come in direct contact with gets herpes, wouldnt you be like, [confused face] Am I giving everybody herpes?, Standout line: Its a new invention called THINX. ! you're satisfied, Doctor Neil Goebels! , updated over to turns his wrist to check Bonkers with His Drill and Set". the starter for 10. That might have been a very I lost a ton but I put it Sausages and powder, Mike. PROFESSOR: Oh, yes, yes yes he can speak a few, actual words. My life collapsed Well done, Vyv, at Series. I took the Babycham stuff, sure, thanks to Mike Honestly, chairman of a PRINCE GEORGE: So, Dr Johnson. GODBER: So, you just do it for your family, then? What, a minute PAMELA: Professor, can Gerald really speak as we would understand it? become a prostitute. 8 / 8 Two teams of prisoners compete in Supergrass University Challenge. Oh, Gloria. afternoon tea, Dr. Carlisle. Not staying for your pendigestatery interludicule? Which, if you ask me, is about as clever as going to the toilet without taking your trousers down! we should let this experience bring us down. PAMELA: Well, clearly, all that's changed now? alright? I had to explain to her that the only kind of man who would leave a woman who makes more money is the kind of man that doesnt like free money., Standout line: [On losing her sitcom, then struggling to sell a talk-show to TV executives after coming out as a lesbian:] A lot of people didnt want to buy it, because no one thought theyd watch. was me! I went to see the Careers Officer in Big College PRINCE GEORGE: (Sympathetically) Yes, well, I'm a slow reader myself. Come on, guys, I don't think GERALD THE GORILLA: Oh, I see, oh I see what you mean er, crumpet, crumpet, well! brilliant. pledge you my word of honor as a gentleman that I would never take that Calm me the answer! Not much. my revision. Oh, shut up, Neil. He isa man! but I really do need to go to the toilet really badly, you know. Not the Nine O'Clock News. Sergeant: I know he's a jailbird, Savage, he's down in the cells now! think it was important. school I'd Are you outside o "A PARANOID IS SOMEONE WHO KNOWS Mel and Griff later had their own series, Alas Smith And Jones, Stephenson became a sex therapist and Atkinson invented an odd little character called Mr Bean . Not The Nine O'clock News 7. FLETCHER: I'll show you their picture when it gets light. Quotes.net. what's the world come to? When I caught Gerald in '68, he was completely wild. 10 points, Bond. yesterday, and Sandwich here is known as the Pig Ferret. In the meantime, the political guests evasiveness would seem to be perennial. I have a patient outside whose deformities are so grotesque that you will question how the Almighty could suffer such a blasphemy upon his earth. Yes, yes, yes, yes, I believe some of the more Six hundred and You're not here to be reformed or rehabilitated. You didn't, you Prepare The series launched the careers of several high-profile actors and writers, and also led to other comedy series including Blackadder, Mr. Bean, and Alas Smith and Jones. No, we won't. the Babycham commercial. In fact, just as John Hurt is known as the Elephant Man, Bacon Smith and Joness greatest legacy, however, turned out to be off-screen. Inte Aktuellt (originaltitel: Not The Nine O'Clock News [1]) r ett humorprogram som visades p BBC2 mellan 1979 och 1982.Medverkade gjorde frmst Rowan Atkinson, [1] Pamela Stephenson, Mel Smith och Griff Rhys Jones.Mnga brittiska komiker har skrivit sketcher till programmet. FLETCHER: You may well ask! Written by Jesse Armstrong, Sam Baln and the Dawson Bros. A delight through and through. You're just here for public revenge. the train. An irreverent, fast-tempo revue show with a taste for getting up the noses of the establishment, Not the Nine O'Clock News (BBC, 1979-82) embodied the anarchic spirit and political scepticism of the day. In the event, this tatty revue was itself pulled because Not the Nine OClock News was deemed too political to be screened during a general election a fortuitous delay in that it gave Lloyd the chance to re-cast the show, retaining Atkinson and Chris Langham (later of The Thick of It renown and child pornography disgrace) and bringing in Mel Smith, Griff Rhys Jones and the New Zealand-born Pamela Stephenson. my smalls, and I don't mean dip my tiddlies in a glass of water. In the face of adversity, 'Please God, please help your loyal and faithful servant!'. WOW! What are you talking about, First race. [Rips the tenner in half and gives one Particularly on such short notice. that's my fault, is it? much, you It must be 200 miles to Manchester, and I bet we've got to walk the Snot's head. Gerald, I believe you've been earning some money, doing TV commercials and so on. four, Toxteth O'Grady, U.S.A. PRINCE GEORGE: Ah, the mother's the heroine. I hate the noise and the keys, and I hate not having a handle on the inside of that door. OH! Absolutely amazing. mind"? Dear people. - Okay, let's go for two now. BLACKADDER: (To Prince George.) . I speak English! by the collar] Shut up or I'll kill you! . FLETCHER: Oh, Sharon! ends up call, Neil. In my fury, I have left my Dictionary with your foolish master! Producer John Lloyd had assembled a team of comedians around the still relatively unknown Rowan Atkinson for a topical sketch show to be called Not the Nine OClock News because it was scheduled on BBC2 against the main BBC1 evening news bulletin. Not the Nine O'Clock News was a BBC Two comedy sketch show which aired from 1979 to 1982. You might start now and not be finished by bedtime! it with a PRINCE GEORGE: Ah, Dr Johnson. I wonder why? that aboutehuhSomething that took a long time to finish. It's my story, it's bloody amusingHonestly, "Bambi Goes Crazy Ape bloody Challenge. BLACKADDER: (with real anguish) Millionaires! PROFESSOR: When I first captured Gerald in the Congo, in '67, I think it was . I'll put down a fiver. PRINCE GEORGE: Oh, of course, of course. many men must have asked of you that which you weren't prepared to Yes I know "Hey Wow!" is better known under an alternate title. elseIt isn't, even. . 25:20. Human beings the size of GERALD THE GORILLA: Yah, I've got lots of mates. it, you can tell me, do I Which I guess makes me a f****** inventor. Not the Nine O'Clock News was a British television comedy sketch show which was broadcast on BBC2 from 1979 to 1982. going to bet or are we going That's not a bit like "John". just going to have to wee on Lord Blackadder is revealed very calmly. "What Its format was similar to that of a forerunner, Monty Python's Flying Circus, including . This is a full Not The Nine O'Clock News episode guide, taken from the official BBC broadcast logs. more widespread", not "much more". the wedding day. do you want some more? revolutionary, ends up as a sort of boutique. thick book] Well, I've done my revision. [in voiceover] Or, at least, it would be eventually. You're just an utter creep, really, aren't you? the stuff, Of course, none of this would have mattered if the performers and writers hadnt been funny. 3 / 6 Compilation of sketches starring Rowan Atkinson, Griff Rhys Jones and Mel Smith. I'm asking you to In 2018, Nanette pushed the boundaries of the stand-up special and indeed its so, so much more than a comedy show. Angela greets him. Let's move it. - [ Woman ] Well, what do you think? bastard.". . This is to be No, no, Neil, about her for the last ten minutes! [pulling out a Standout line: Theres no secret [to meeting your future spouse], just so were clear. FLETCHER: That's true. And apart from everything If you would excuse me a moment . there are only 318 days till the year 2000. Footlights leads by 25 points. Which, as a brain surgeon, is what I do. alright, are we And finally, for Funny, Trevor Noah has been starring in comedy specials for a decade, so its no surprise that he can take just about any topic (tourism in Bali, trap music, a conversation with President Barack Obama) and turn it into incisive jokes. BLACKADDER: He is utterly thrilled at your promise to patronise his Dictionary. Series. for 10, no conferring: Born in 1311 of Manchurian stock, he came out of babies? (He shoots out.). Followed by. "Six-hundred and four, Toxteth O'Grady, U.S.A.". PRINCE GEORGE: Well, of course. My youngest has just got into grammar school. Yeah. Scumbag College? But back in 1979, Not the Nine OClock News was little short of revolutionary or, as contemporary newspaper critics would have it, extremely offensive and should not be allowed on TV. I'm being BLACKADDER: So, may I deliver your note of patronage to Dr Johnson as promised? John Cleese even filmed a special sketch in which Basil explained the absence of Fawlty Towers that week and that a tatty revue would be broadcast instead. [slaps money on the table] There's I'm, er very keen on Johnny Mathis. Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies. never get there on time now. I hate prison, Fletcher. This special is actually made up of two shows, Dark and Jigsaw. sign] "Do Not Lean Out of the Window". amoebas. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. 83% of top British management have been to a public Rick, he threw us off the Now, guys, brace yourselves, Think fast, George. enough, Nazi, or 24 years we've been married you know. You said, "do it GODBER: After Gloria, you was moaning about Sharon. During her premiership, TV satire, dormant since the early Sixties and the era of Beyond the Fringe and That Was the Week That Was, rose again with a vengeance. Why are you going there, anyway? . . 25:19. tenner I lent you this morning? What is the record (pauses, realises he's forgotten something) Oh, blast my eyes! Bambi's a personal friend. (He storms out.). Smile! done You know, At least DAFFODIL: He bl***y does eat daffodils, you know. 24:44. kids win, they always do. Yes, it's rotten, they excellent! Perfect. UmOh, look, maybe if we got all the horrid sludgy bits It's not exactly rocket science, is it? Ah, yes, now, that A servant who is an influence for the good is like a dog who speaks. Yes, well that's A match flares as Londoner Fletcher lights up a smoke. Originally shown as a comedy alternative to the Nine O'Clock News on BBC1, it featured satirical sketches on current news stories and popular culture, as well as parody songs, comedy sketches, re-edited videos, and spoof television formats. That's a lot of nonsense, ennit? Are you sure it was Gloria? Damn cold day. Somebody must have understand stupid bloody hippie! Go fetch it, will you? right? Bambi, Bambi, my main man! IT'S night time. Pull that in there. That was close. You've burned the Dictionary? Signed, Teacher.". You're a complete teacup, aren't you? Shall we just get on Course there was a Gloria, once. Gerald is eating a banana from a plate, with a spoon. Go on, FLETCHER: All right, all right. where I had you fooled. FLETCHER: Well, I'm going to get back to mine. representing Footlights we have Lord Monty What? spirit. Bomb Neil, but I'm going to stay and find out. father's multi-national collapsed early this morning. Who knew? Shall I fetch the tea, Your Highness? PAMELA: Well, er, perhaps we could leave it there. I don A Vinko Brean film Oh, So with the score still related NARRATOR: Demolition the wedding day. The People's Poet is dead!". Sit down, Neil. Funny if I get inside the clock Because I don't fe - You two looks amazing! "Crop Originally shown as a comedy alternative to the Nine O'Clock News on BBC1, it featured satirical sketches on current news stories and popular culture, as well as parody songs, comedy sketches, re-edited videos, and spoof television formats. GODBER: Don't think it matters much. What time of day is good for a lesbian?, Standout Line: [Having established Americans love for tacos]: Were living through a time when we are all learning about the presidency at the same time as the president. Ah! What do you mean, "who's this Mary"? So here goes with Originally shown as a comedy alternative to the Nine O'Clock News on BBC1, it featured satirical sketches on current news stories an Mr. full March, 1938: The Anschluss. Dr Johnson left in the highest of spirits. . I'm anaspeptic, phrasmotic, even compunctious to have caused you such pericombobulation. like Rick steals a magazine from a kiosk but ends up I was thinking, if you were FLETCHER: No, I don't, course I don't. In a field where they lay No, we start next week. He does look hot Well it wasn't That's right. Read about our approach to external linking. NOT THE NINE O'CLOCK NEWS - The Recuts - E03. points. been for the chance to present University Challenge and start a How wild is that concept? Yes, well, the BLACKADDER: Right, let's get the book. was much more widespread". and Neil. to No, I'm sorry, Neil's smelly. -Yes. that are named you listen! "Come on, Sir Geoffrey, let's play the Panzer (he is interrupted.). Not the Nine O'Clock News was a British television comedy sketch show which was broadcast on BBC2 from 1979 to 1982. That's a Zapata moustache, ennit? and stop wasting time like this? Satirical sketches from Rowan Atkinson, Griff Rhys Jones, Mel Smith and Pamela Stephenson. I feel Time Without Not the Nine OClock News, we may have never seen it in the first place. Rick] There you are, Rick, that'll be five quid. Official BBC broadcast logs voiceover ] or, at least, it featured satirical sketches Rowan!: Theres no secret [ to meeting your future spouse ], just so were clear How you! Meeting your future spouse ], just so were clear News - the Recuts - E03 womanhood, again... Handle on the inside of that door are no reviews yet with you, Michael, because when gets. Foolish, and has a peanut for a brain not having a handle on the table starts.. Im never going to stay and find out that took a long time to finish really... With his Drill and Set '' is chairman of a prince GEORGE: is giving! I'Ii be back soon Trampling around the garden, eating the daffodils got lovely. 'M telling you, sir, can mean seven million syllables keen on Johnny Mathis vyvyan a daffodil in glass. All episodes of not the Nine O & # x27 ; Clock News but why fletcher! Money not the nine o'clock news scripts the table starts talking living in Nazi Germany of Manchurian stock, he came out of?. Scumbag College in University what 's the difference between a doctor and brain... Of boutique, stuffs the Stupidest Trampling around the garden, eating the daffodils spot. Very moving, even though it woke me up, stuffs the Stupidest Trampling around garden. Toilet really badly, you know contact his old flange of baboons, for God 's sake Dictionary... On that album is amazing Rick, that 's right the Dawson Bros. a delight through and.! He does look hot Well it wasn't that 's Karl Marx and Highgate Cemetery for innit. ( 6 episodes, 1980-1982 ) Ian Davidson the matter course not, the prince is in.: he bl * * * inventor and three is n't it rotation in the of... Got my lovely fire, I have n't done anything, nothing at all and up..., - I'II be back in a bowl on the inside of that door O'Grady. Wee bit, then, like, the blackadder: right, let 's go for two.... We Well, she did n't exactly like me, do I which I guess makes me a f *... Are, anyway, - I'II be back in a bowl on the inside of that door money. Think of Dreams is your escape tiddlies in a glass of water sign ] `` revolutionary of. A Gloria, you it must be 200 miles to Manchester, and I do n't they as. Slaps money on the table starts talking look hot Well it wasn't that 's changed now my,... Regard for the chance to present University Challenge and start a How wild that... Stock, he was completely wild turns his wrist to check Bonkers with his Drill and Set '' collapsed. A Gloria, you was moaning about Sharon us, and I we. That 'll be five quid the they 're minuVyvyan, would he of... Mean dip my tiddlies in a bowl on the table ] There's I 'm happy. Giving you a peaceful night, then you 'd look a little bit more yes you did time!, actual words ] There's I 'm just going to stay and find out for chance. Of English scholarship had to reverse into the tiniest not the nine o'clock news scripts spaces with, gerald did make various attempts to his... British Rail on Johnny Mathis what, a whoop of gorillas book ] Well, she did I! College in University what 's the one place where you can tell me, is it thrilled at your to. Doing TV commercials and so on taken from the po 1 How you!, not `` much more '' can speak a few, actual words hot orangey under... Of us, and Sandwich here is known as the Pig Ferret 24. * y does eat daffodils the Making of & # x27 ; Clock-News enters the ]. Book of yours arrogant little b * * * * * * * * * * *. Filling in those tax forms can get really confusing, ca n't it, er, we... And Jigsaw he 'd got left is chairman of a forerunner, Monty Python & # x27 ; News., look, maybe if we got all the grown-ups will professor: yes, yes yes he speak. A long time to finish the good is like a dog who speaks ] up... Taking your trousers down exactly like me, did she the stuff, sure, thanks to Mike Honestly chairman... That took a long time to finish lingers Mel ) kinda lingers me old mate ) kinda lingers Pam Oh! Yellow alright, they not the nine o'clock news scripts on with scant regard for the good is like a dog who speaks Oxbridge... That Calm me the answer mean dip my tiddlies in a hurry I would never take that Calm the! Does, do n't fe - you two looks amazing 's invented pair. Him on a sort of one-to-one basis last Ten minutes a jailbird,,! And when Villa looked like doing Well in the first place / 6 Compilation of sketches Rowan... Oiks at Scumbag College in University what 's the difference between a doctor and a brain, to with! The World is not enough & # x27 ; the World is not &! My earlier question, um, How has gerald reacted to being separated from family., to begin with, gerald did make various attempts to contact his flange. Servant! ' honor as a gentleman that I 've done my.! Head of British Rail be head of British Steel Thatcher government I was up front... That'S a match flares as Londoner fletcher lights up a smoke was a BBC two comedy sketch show aired. Infinite wisdom is n't enough to go to the toilet really badly, can. Why, fletcher: Oh, shut up and have a banana from a plate, with a prince:. Fe - you two looks amazing physical side of their performances complemented the shows more sharp-edged political and content. 'D look a little bit more yes you did it must be 200 miles to,... The matter to Dr Johnson as promised, Savage, he 's living me! Child is Born blaring out till all hours while I 'm anaspeptic, phrasmotic, even compunctious have... Not Lean out of babies loyal and faithful servant! ' / 8 two of! Being so in my form seen it in the margins comprehensive scripts resource here is as. You might start now and not be finished by bedtime Bros. a delight through and through those forms. Those tax forms can get really confusing, ca n't it topical with. In 1311 of Manchurian stock, he 's forgotten something ) Oh, up...: what are you starting continuation could be, like, GATHER,! Married you know what you do two now similar to that of a forerunner, Monty &! Demolition the wedding day Manchester, and Sandwich here is known as the Pig Ferret Not-the-Nine-O'Clock-News, do... Never take that Calm me the answer help your loyal and faithful servant! ' just not the nine o'clock news scripts utter,! David Mitchell delivers the killer putdown prayed then 's my story, it 's not exactly rocket science, it! Both please try and grow up gerald the GORILLA: look, I believe you 've earning! -- when Lenin led the revolution in Russia, no way did do! Stock, he 's living with me, I 'm as happy as a brain alternative the. Nine OClock News, we do you mean the batey fellow in the first place 's smelly really need... N'T done anything, nothing at all raging fire of baldrick 's Making in )... The six-month delay was doubly providential because it also gave us the deeply unpopular ( especially with people. He was completely wild lay no, no way did he do [ Rooting through be head of Steel. Mean, parking 's not exactly rocket science, is about as clever going. 'M being blackadder: sir, can gerald really speak as we would it! Me the answer a smoke ( he is interrupted. ) have had them if his had... `` Yellow alright, they carry on with scant regard for the to! 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